realize youve seen it before?
Chuck Norris giving Ben Laden
the idea of 9-11, thats bull!
But Chuck Norris
works for the CIA.
Yesterday it was Schwarzy...
Seen how the Arabs in "True Lies"
get all excited like hyenas?
Action films need bad guys.
Exactly! In the 70s,
it was the Viets, now the Arabs.
Stallone in "Rambo 3",
Hauer in "Wanted: Dead or Alive",
Bruce Willis in "The Siege",
Steven Seagal
realize were
MOVING UP STONE SPIRALING STAIRS, up up up in what we now see
is a medieval cathedral. And as we continue MOVING UP
something TRICKLES DOWN INTO FRAME - BLOOD. Running thin,
then thicker, as we CONTINUE TO MOVE UP the stairs and find -
A BODY, sprawled awkwardly across the stones, arms and legs
akimbo, not so much Christ-like as victim-like. In one hand
the Body holds a GUN he never
really
mean it.
He struggles to free his hand.
STACY
Yes I do. Keep it in your
pants Rod.
He gives up, aggravated.
ROD
Maybe it wont stay in.
??
STACY
Maybe you better just
drive me home.
He starts the car, glares at her for a second, then turns it off.
ROD
Let me just ask you a serious
question first.
STACY
What?
ROD
Arent you worried you
could die a virgin?
STACY
(sarcastically)
Yeah. Im extrem
-------------------------------------------------
Me And You And Everyone We Know Script
If you really love me,
then lets make a vow...
right here, together...
right now.
- Okay?
- Okay.
All right.
Repeat after me
Im gonna be free.
Im gonna be free.
And Im gonna be brave.
Im gonna be brave.
Good.
And the next one is
Im gonna live each day
as if it were my last.
Oh, thats good.
You like that? Yeah
real good.
- Were in business. - Excellent.
Theresjust one problem.
This guyAl keeps asking me questions about my counterfeiter.
- Really? - He asked too many questions.
My instinct usually tells me when theres something wrong.
Theres something wrong here, so I had him followed.
Hes a fucking Secret Service agent.
What doyou think I ought to do?
Make sure the body doesnt wash up on shore.
I wanty
real lady killer.
He is making imperceptible adjustments to his over-moussed
hair. Thelma watches approvingly.
THELMA
Hon.
DARRYL
What.
THELMA
(she decides not to
tell him)
Have a good day at work today.
DARRYL
Uh-huh.
THELMA
Hon?
DARRYL
What?!
THELMA
You want anything special for
dinner?
DARRYL
No, Thelma, I dont give a shit what
we have for dinner. I may not even
make it home for dinner. You kn
real victim here?
Let me suggest to you
the following.
Your husband,
on a prior occasion,
had slapped you-- beat you.
I think that word
is not inappropriate.
No, I--
Let me finish, please.
Im not concerned
with who slapped whom first.
Your husband,
who had beaten you repeatedly--
No, he never--
Please-- repeatedly, was at the time
brandishing your firearm.
- It was his gun.
- And well get it back
really think
youre a monster, Csar?
- Come on, let me see.
- Stick your hand up your ass!
Take it easy, brat!
Im sick of all your stories.
- Leave me alone!
- Ill kick the shit out of you!
Leave me alone!
I cant work with you in here.
Leave us on our own.
On my responsibility.
Youre just a spoiled brat who--
My parents are dead, asshole!
You made up a story
so as not to admit what you did.
Is tha
real
war face!
JOKER
Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaagh!
HARTMAN
You didnt scare me! Work on it!
JOKER
Sir, yes, sir!
Sergeant HARTMAN speaks into cowboys face.
HARTMAN
Whats your excuse?
COWBOY
Sir, excuse for
what, sir?
HARTMAN
Im asking the fucking questions
here,
Private. Do you understand?!
COWBOY
Sir,
yes, sir!
HARTMAN
Well thank you very much! Can I be in
charge
for a while?
COWBOY
Sir, yes, sir!
HA
ON A YOUNG ADULT
Struggling through a horse stance, his face in real pain. He is trying his best to hold the stance, but his legs are quivering. He drops out of the stance onto his knees. Master Kwan is right beside him.
YOUNG ADULT
Sifu Kwan, was that long enough? Its been 10 minutes...
Sifu Kwan shakes his head and puts his hands behind his back as he walks past the student.
KWAN