분야
hwp Like, wow. Like, crap. Last year I was a high school brat.
But now Im here. Hope Im the one you pick to cheer!
- Fantastic! - Im sorry. What?
Oh, nothing. Dont let me slow you down. Its just... Well, youre a surprise.
- How do you mean? - You have great spirit.
But just a tad more volume, if you would.
- I apologize. - Continue.
Like, whoo. Like, whee. Im at the university.
Im psyched. Im here. Hope Im the one you choose to cheer.
I yell real loud and make the Stingers super proud.!
Brilliant.!
My dear, you are wonderful... cheer genius personified.
A real individual.
Im joking, you spaz!
- Pardon me? - That was a cheer?
That was the most boring, unoriginal, biggest piece of crap Ive ever seen!
You suck!
Mom, where are we? Where are you, dear?
You finally made it. Youre in college.
Oh, man!
Hi. Can you guys tell me how to get to Bancroft Hall?
Hi. Can you tell me how to get to...
Hi, girls. Can you guys tell me how to get to Bancroft...
Excuse me!
Hi. Its where some of the cheerleaders are staying.
Um, Im trying out for the team.
You girls dont cheer, do you?
First of all, its women, not girls.
Oh. Second, um, we do neo-modern ballet.
We dont wave pom-poms.
And third, we cant direct you to Bancroft Hall,
because Nathaniel Bancroft was a slave owner and an imperialist!
Okay. Thanks.
Appreciate it.
Youre not giving up already, are you? Monica!
First day of college, Im already saving my roommate.
You did not have to save me. I have been saving...
your butt ever since cheerleader camp. Have not!
Really? I remember a time...
a spotter was out of position and one of our cheerleaders...
was gonna do a face-plant.
Who was that cheerleader again? Okay. Okay. I get it.
I think the score is Monica, two. Whittier, zero.
And... Bancroft Hall is this way.
Did you know that Nathaniel Bancroft was a slave owner...
and an imperialist? Our room has a ceiling fan.
As well as paint balloons, panty trees,
super-gluing faculty doors, releasing lab animals...
and most important, Id like to remind you...
that if you must...
urinate,
please... do it in a toilet.
Do not... I repeat... Do not urinate...
on an original manuscript of The Canterbury Tales...
located in the school library.
You writing this down? Youd think I wouldnt have to say that.
The Nutcracker is a patriarchal ballet.
Okay? The only good thing in The Nutcracker are the rats, and they die.
Shakespeare. Hamlet?
"Euripidie..." Euri... Eur...
Euripides.
Lastly, we hope you take advantage of the many extracurriculars...
here at the university.
Although I must report weve had to cut funding...
to some of the more non-essential programs...
on campus such as the martial arts club,
- the ballet society... Wha...
and the entire musical theater department.
Thats a worthwhile program.! Fortunately,
we havent had to cut any money from our two prized programs...
the football team... Thats right!
- Yeah! - And... your seven-time...
defending collegiate champion Stinger cheerleading squad!
- Yea! - Lets hear it for our heroes.!
Tina.! Tina.! Tina.! Tina.!
Tina! Tina! Tina! Tina!
Tina! Tina! Tina! Tina!
Hey, everybody! Im Tina Hammersmith!
Yall ready to rock the body electric?
- Ahhh! - Lets get this party started!
Five, six, seven, eight!
Whoo.!
Yeah.! Whoo-hoo-hoo-hoo.! You go, girl.!
Two, three, four...
Stingers in the house! Were on the attack!
- Thats right! - Got no extra fat!
We dont eat Big Macs! Its gross!
- Step to us.! You might get smacked.! - Whacked.!
We got more game than the man they call Shaq!
The moonwalk! The twist! The shake and bake! The what?
We can do it all right here at State!
Strap yourself in so your mind wont blow!
Sit back, relax and enjoy the show!
Whats wrong with you people? Stop it!
Yeah! Stingers!
This is terrible. What do you mean "terrible"?
- Theyre perfect. - I know. Thats whats terrible.
They are perfect.
Speaking of perfect. You ever checked out your own ass?
Whoa! Gross!
Just pay him no mind. No. No. I think we should pay him mind.
I mean, this... this man has a lot to say. I do.
- I have a lot to say. - Hes a unique individual.
- Very unique individual. - With his own thoughts and ideas.
My own thoughts. My own ideas.
- Who would never make a fool of himself. - Never ever...
make a fool of myself. Even if he was blindly mimicking whatever I said.
Even if I was blindly...
Hey, punk. Be watchin you.
Smart guy.
Thank you. No problem.
Belly ring? No belly ring?
Its a cheerleading tryout. Theyre going to be looking at your moves,
not your body jewelry. Oh, I know.
But heres my theory: If they concentrate on my belly,
they wont recognize if I mess up on my back handsprings.
Whit, youre not gonna mess up. Ive seen your cheer skills.
Theyre for real.
Maybe for high school, but this is college.
And in college you have to be the poo.
Well, that shaggy boy at orientation sure thought you were the poo.
He was all on you like ugly on an Osbourne.
Him?
You think?
He did smile at me.
Mm-hmm.
But I cant lose my concentration. Ive re
