funniest kid at Jackson High?
You told me a hilarious joke
the other day.
-A frayed knot--
-String...
-...walks into the bar.
-Wants a drink. That was funny.
Youre a funny guy.
Oh, l dont know.
l mean, its such a giant city.
How can you possibly meet anyone?
You want the secret to making friends?
-Sure.
-l picked this up in the service.
Youll have a lot of buddies
if you remember this one rule:
l
Joe Dirt Script
Turn it up.
Dang.
Thats what Im talking about. L.A.!
Radio station l.D.
Coming to work. Joe Dirt.
Dont try and church it up, son.
Dont you mean Joe Dirt?
Naming you that, your daddy
must have really hated you.
Youre wrong, brother.
I got a good name
for this car: Rusty.
-Shitll buff out.
-Dont bother.
Drive this piece of crap off a cliff.
Do us all a favor.
This look like a piece
Arizona Dream Script
"Good morning, Columbus."
My mothers eternal words, reminding
me America was already discovered,
and that day-dreaming
was a long way from lifes truths.
Why tell me the difference
between an apple and a bicycle?
If I bite a bicycle and ride an apple,
Ill know the difference.
But thinking about what to do made me
more tired than actually doing.
I remember my father said:
If yo
Martin Lawrence Live: Runteldat Script
Listen, youre in a privileged position
to learn a thing or two.
Keep your mouth shut
and your eyes open.
Runteldat.
I been through so much,
you know, in my life, so...
I kind of wanted to get back out
and tell my own story.
Maryland, DC, is my hometown,
so I grew up here.
Im a little man, so you kind of get
the little man"complex sometimes.
You feel like you
stories would resonate more profoundly with the human soul.
l mean, its exactly because tragedy hits on the truly painful essence of life
that people run to my comedies for escape.
No, no.
Tragedy confronts. Comedy escapes.
Look, you guys, what are we discussing here?
ls there a deeper reality in comedy or tragedy? Who can make such a judgment?
Look, let me tell you a story and you tell me, is it
Respect for Art ( Faulty )
Summary: the teacher saw a caricature of his face on the blackboard. It was sharp, accurate, and funny. The class waited for his reaction. The teacher observed it with interest and then said: "It is too well done to be erased. Let the artist first copy it on paper. My compliments to the talented caricaturist."
Segment's reason: Our team think this story is "F", be
Dream Society means
not only just market needs are exceeding
the physical wealth but also
a society changed into emotional things
such as culture, value, thoughts, and beliefs.
It is a society not competing by function
but distinct products by design, brand, and even a story.
The trend is already progressing in the beginningof the 21st century and Nike and Coke are representative co
Orange County Script
Mr Marcus Skinner,
care of the English Department,
Stanford University.
Dear Mr Skinner...
My name is Shaun Brumder,
and I think youre a total genius.
I Iive in California,
in a place called Orange County.
A year ago, I was just
another Orange County surfer,
spending my days
at the beach with my buddies...
...playing volleyball...
Spike it, Shaun!
...spending my nights
around
stories.
- Leave me alone!
- Ill kick the shit out of you!
Leave me alone!
I cant work with you in here.
Leave us on our own.
On my responsibility.
Youre just a spoiled brat who--
My parents are dead, asshole!
You made up a story
so as not to admit what you did.
Is that true?
What?
That youre a spoiled brat.
My father had a restaurant chain.
Thats not my fault.
When did your parents die?
Fifteen
Beauty and the Beast
NARRATOR: Once upon a time, in a faraway land, a young prince lived in a
shining castle. Although he had everything his heart desired,
the prince was spoiled, selfish, and unkind. But then, one
winters night, an old beggar woman came to the castle and
offered him a single rose in return for shelter from the bitter
cold. Repulsed by her haggard appearance, the prince sneered a