Monty Python and the Holy Grail
Screenplay Graham Chapman
John Cleese
Terry Gilliam
Eric Idle
Terry Jones
Michael Palin
Produced by Mark Forstater
Directed by Terry Gilliam
Terry Jones
Cast List:
Graham Chapman King Arthur
Hiccoughing Guard
Three-Headed Knight
Neil Innes The First Self-Destructive Monk
Robins Least Favourite Minstrel
The Page Crushed by a Rabbit
The Owner of a Duck
Terry Jones D
Love And Death Script
How I got into this predicament,
Ill neverknow.
Absolutely incredible.
To be executed fora crime
I never committed.
Of course,
isnt all mankind in the same boat?
Isnt all mankind ultimately executed
for a crime it never committed?
The difference is
that all men go eventually,
but I go six oclock tomorrow morning.
I was supposed to go at fiive oclock,
but I have a smart lawye
Deliver Us From Eva Script
You know when a funeral is really awful?
When its yours.
Thats me, Ray Adams-
young, gifted and dead.
These are my remains.
And these three mournful brothers,
theyre the men who killed me.
Aw, they look so sad, dont they?
But this is how they really feel.
But theyre not the real reason Im dead.
These are their women. Fine, aint they?
Some families are blessed with great
private college...
or university that isn`t
in financial trouble.
Oh, all right. Name another.
- You don`t think it`s too much?
- No. It`s elegant.
And it`s a wonderful idea to go
with the big wedding this time.
It does put the pressure
on the professor to show up.
If he forgets this time,
that`s it.
Well, in his case,
once is justifiable...
and twice is understandable,
but three times--
Coming t
privately circulating among high level western leaders, that the Soviet Union had been at work on what was darkly hinted to be the ultimate weapon, a doomsday device. Intelligence sources traced the site of the top secret Russian project to the perpetually fog shrouded wasteland below the arctic peaks of the Zokov islands. What they were building, or why it should be located in a such a remote an
private streets of Fremont Place.
HIS POV - THROUGH BINOCULARS
as the Mercedes cruises through the quiet neighborhood.
BACK TO SCENE
The man, PAUL JAVAL, is thirtyish, nervous; with short, sandy
hair. He takes the binoculars away from his face and we see
his eyes -- theyre a strange, unnaturally light gray.
Javal takes an ORANGE PILL from an unlabeled prescription
bottle and pops it into his mout
private person
who can, at times...
be difficult to deal with if you
dont know how to handle the situation.
- And you did.
- Well, I guess, as well as anybody.
I dont envy my replacement,
Ill tell you that.
I was in her husbands White House,
and I saw her in better times.
She has her good days
and her bad days now.
I guess you could say...
shes several different personalities
in one, like many pe
private room for him.
Nothing is too good for my brother-in-law.
- Check with the admission office.
- No red tape, Sister. Take him upstairs.
- How about the penthouse suite?
- Now youre talking, Doctor.
- Hello, uncle Harry.
- Hi.
Theyre not gonna
cut him open, are they?
Shut up. Charlotte, take her home.
Take everybody home.
Arent you coming? What about dinner?
The hell with it. Im not lettin h
hired from
outside the government pool,
I dont get conveyed
to the next secretary,
so now Im out a job...
Because he couldnt
keep his hands off women.
Do you have proof?
He thinks he was
being so clever.
He had a private phone line
installed in his office.
Nobody else could answer it.
I picked it up once.
Said hello,
and its nobody home.
It rings, he shuts the door.
Why not hang a sign?
Do yo
Privately, aides marveled at his spirit
as he performed his usual morning routine...
...by milking the White House goats...
...and finishing the second helping
of grapefruit and creamed corn.
Tonight, the president and his top
advisers will be burning the midnight oil.
Sabotage.
My God man, what does it mean?
We must tighten security, sir.
Find out whos behind it.
No, no, no. The word abotage.
Wh