departs.
You son of a bitch!
Lets make sure its
a smooth transition.
The Guedj sisters are back.
Well track them on surveillance...
...but do keep an eye on all
bathrobes, cutlery and liaht fixtures.
Sothebys director, Caroline Lane,
has switched from the Four Seasons.
She requested a park view...
...and favors purple orchids
and lavender scents.
Assemblyman Chris Marshall
arrives today.
Hes aear
He roughly picks the dog up by the scruff of the neck, but as he turns it around we see that it is a
stuffed dog. Around its neck is a business card that reads, "You have been had by Ace Ventura -
Pet Detective." He breathes fire.
GRUFF MAN
Son of a bitch!
He smashes the dog to the ground.
EXT. ALLEY - CONTD
As the UPS Man/Ace rounds the corner, his shirt opens up at his pot belly and the Shiatsu
department store
for half of my life.
If you dont buy something,
you put it back.
Herbie...
happy anniversary.
- That was yesterday.
- Go ahead, open it.
"Mexico and the Yucatn.
"Witness the spectacle
of a rare solar eclipse...
from the foot of the Mayan pyramids. "
This is a cruise.
Thats right.
Deluxe accommodations.
All right,
whered you get these?
Do you remember a guy named No-Neck?
They fin
department.
Fucking wank, man.
Next time?
- What?
Thats easy enough for you to say,
sitting pretty as you are, man.
What?
- Sitting pretty. Youve Deirdre there...
Oscar, me and Deirdre broke up.
What? When?
- Few weeks back.
Weeks? Why didnt you tell me then?
How the hell did it happen?
It was felt we should take a bit of a break.
Felt by who? By her, yeah?
John.
Oscar.
Are youse not clocking bac
department, most men overdo it.
Americans practically spray it on with a crop-duster.
My rule: Nothing above the neck,
though I do like a little splash on Big Ben.
You never know where the day may take you.
Almost forgot.
New word for the day.
Ostentatious: The attempt to attract attention to oneself.
Who? Me?
Oh, blimey. Im so rude. I havent introduced myself.
- Im... - Alfie?
There you go. Alfi
department last summer.
I know--
[ Laughs ] It actually, um-- It made me cry.
Why? Cause it was so--
[ Clattering ]
- Bad? - Not at all. Because it was so good!
Thanks.
- How have you been,Joe? - I got a divorce, actually.
Oh. Oh!
- Im so sorry. - No, no. Thats okay.
- You all right? - Yeah. You know, its weird.
No, but Im doin great. I stay busy.
During the week, its all about my daughter Natali
FIRES, and the other disappears when it is hit, to
reappear, spinning wildly, in the distance. We HEAR a sound
like a crack of lightning.
??
7 REAL WORLD 7
??
A video game in an arcade. On the screen is a typical version of
Tank Wars with computer generated representations of tanks in a 2-D
maze.
??
8/9 OMITTED 8/9
??
10 ELECTRONIC WORLD 10
Two other game warriors on the grid, this time throwing
departed...
we therefore commit his body
to the ground.
Earth to earth,
ashes to ashes, dust to dust.
In certain hope of the resurrection
to eternal life.
Venus must have heard my plea
She has sent someone
Along for me
- Are you all right?
- Im fine.
You should take it easy.
Youre gonna be drunk.
I know. I wanna be drunk.
Youre gonna get sick.
No, I wont.
Dont you think maybe you
should help your
Firewater, Tonto? Is that what
you...
Billy whirls, swings at Ganz. Both men roll to the ground.
BRADY
Hey! Jesus Christ!
THE OTHER GUARDS
Seeing the commotion, they run toward it.
GANZ AND BILLY
As they struggle, Billy slips a pistol into Ganz hand.
BRADY
Thats a state prisoner,
asshole...! Back off...
ROADSIDE
Brady pulls Billy away from Ganz just as one of the other
officers arrives... Ganz su
fires...
BILLY
Yeah! Good-bye Mr. Spaulding! ...Here, here! Quick!
SCENE 3
JOSH
Got it. Need it. Need it. Got it.
BILLY
Hey. Hey. Hey! You ever go by Simpsons desk when shes grading
papers or somethin? When shes leaned over, you can see right down
her shirt.
JOSH
No!
BILLY
Swear to God.
JOSH
Bra?
BILLY
No. No. Shes got one of those undershirt things. So if you get real
close to the board, you